More Than You Can Fathom
by Akitsuki Akira
Summary: The reason why I hate you is because you make me sad. The person that makes me weak, the person that distracts my soul, and the person that won't let me be alone, is you. I want you to love me, and yet, you love someone else. KayukixAkabara, oneshot


Putting the novel that she was reading on the coffee table, Hirasaka Kayuki stood up and strode towards the balcony of her room, taking note of the heavy downpour outside.

_It's raining? _Sighing, the 50th Black Swan took her leave and started to wander aimlessly around the hallway. _And I didn't even notice that it was night time already._

Two weeks has already passed and still, Miss Bridget and the others still didn't seem to find the true monument that sealed Queen Adelheid. The Vampire King had yet to finish his preparations for the space trip but, she dare say, that the he was already getting on her nerves.

She had to wound him several times for him to stop disobeying her orders. He was stubborn, not really learning no matter how many times she pierced his body. But sometimes, she kept wondering why her body would not budge every time she wanted to strike him the second time whenever he gave her a witty remark. And it was happening for a while now.

But there was this one tiny little thing that got her mind haywire whenever she thinks about it.

Kayuki didn't know but… whenever the thought of her claiming the Vampire King's life enters her mind brings a dull pang on her chest. And much more frustrating was, she didn't know _why. _

_Dammit! _Clenching the _haori _more tightly around her shivering form, her _kimono _did a whooshing sound as the wind howled more angrily. A single droplet of water informed her that she was outside the mansion that housed everyone doing the preparations for the trip towards the moon.

Looking at the rain, a barely-there smile founded a way on her face as she reminisced the times when she was still a little child, when she was still a girl filled with sunny smiles and loud laughs. She remembered herself running in the rain; jumping in small puddles making her look like a complete idiot. Then an idea popped out on her head.

Scanning her surroundings, and noticing no one was in sight, Kayuki let out a relieved sigh. _Well, why not?_ It's been a while since she let herself have a few moments of peace and tranquility since the curse of the Black Swan possessed her. Plus, the chance was in front of her. And as if on cue, the heavy downpour became a light, cool rain. _Perfect._

Stepping forward, Kayuki threw her head back, allowing the rain to fall on her face. She had always loved the rain, not the storms but this light one. It had a comforting element that she liked ever since she was a child: she felt as though the rain could wash away all her problems, pains, and insecurities.

_I missed this feeling, _Kayuki mused, staring at the cloudy skies. But then she felt that something was odd.

The rain didn't have its usual effects on her.

There were still feelings inside of her, something so strong that even the rain couldn't wash away. Yet again, she could not sort it out. It was like trying to piece two different parts of a puzzle.

A raindrop fell on her eye, and as she positioned her right arm to brush it away, she saw the black markings tattooed on her hand.

The feelings she tried to forget for just a while returned to her like water gushing out of a dam, the impact so strong that she even felt herself recoil. Clenching her fist, she realized that even how many times she tries to forget, the truth will always come back.

The wind danced around her, pink locks heavy with rain water swaying with it. Her hair then fell with the wetness, too heavy for the clip to hold for it much longer. By then, she was already soaked to the bone, though Kayuki couldn't care less.

_I can't kill the Vampire King, _she thought, now finding the answer, _but then, the curse will swallow me, and dying definitely isn't an option. _If she was puzzled on why she couldn't kill him, she was even more puzzled when she found herself _crying._

Her salty tears mingled with the rain, falling on the puddles bellow her feet. Brushing it away, she found out that the tears won't stop falling, and the answer on _why _she couldn't kill him found itself on her head.

_Oh God, _pink glossy eyes widened, _I love him… I love my eternal enemy. _Her head ached as the _ridiculous _fact was discovered, shaking her head and covering her ears to ward off any thoughts, though her efforts were in vain. _No. I can't love him. Definitely not him. Never._

Even though her mind was still rational, her heart yelled the exact opposite. _You love him. You love him with all your heart. You can't kill him. You can't -._

Kayuki shook her head vigorously, more tears coming from her closed eyes. _No! I have to! And I don't love him!_

_You know you do, _the voice mocked, as if taking enjoyment on Kayuki's demise, _and there's nothing you could do about it, _it continued, taunting more, _absolutely nothing._

-----------------------------

Taking his midnight stroll, Strauss walked with certainty on the dimly-lit corridor, his keen, vampire eyes adjusting on the darkness. After having his space training, he immediately sought refuge in his room, eager to escape Kayuki's watchful eyes.

_Really, _Akabara though, sighing, _what's troubling her lately?_ Recently, he found himself watching the current Black Swan with a troubled look on her pink hues.

He always had felt guilty on Kayuki, Komatsubara Yuki, and the other previous Black Swans, since it was his fault that the curse was made. If not for him, they might have lived a life with normality, instead of the life of hunting him and then being killed on the process.

But then, there's no use on crying over spilled milk. What done is done. There's nothing else he could do, except to move forward. And now, his plan was running smoothly, with the day of Adelheid's revival being near.

The Vampire King was then snapped out of his thoughts when he noticed a pink headed teen standing outside the rain.

_Kayuki, _Akabara thought, recognizing the girl and frowning, taking an umbrella near the door, _what's she doing in the rain, drenched no less?_

Kayuki's shoulders, Akabara noted, were shaking and her hands were clasped on both of her ears. Worried, he took off and shielded both him and the young girl from the rain. After what seemed like years – which was actually just a few seconds, Kayuki finally snapped back to reality, red-colored hues staring at tear-stained pink ones.

-----------------------------

Gasping, Kayuki immediately recoiled, thoroughly taken a back from the sudden appearance of the Vampire King. Cursing his bad timing, the current Black Swan immediately recomposed herself. While she was in the middle of putting her poker-face and arranging her windswept locks, an ivory hand appeared out of nowhere and took hold of her own. Kayuki gave Akabara a pointed stare, somehow bordering on glaring.

"Your wet, Kayuki"

The girl in question deadpanned. "I was actually aware of that"

"And you're crying"

Kayuki wisely kept her mouth shut, her brain unable to process any witty comments to throw at the vampire. Cursing inwardly, she shook Akabara's hand off and started to walk towards the mansion when the latter's hand took hold of hers in a vice like grip.

"Why are you crying?" he inquired, and Kayuki swore she saw worry flicker in them. She mentally slapped herself, not wanting to have false hopes. She turned around to glare at him.

"Mind your own business, Vampire King", the Black Swan spat, turning once again to seek shelter when Akabara's hold on the umbrella slipped only to latch it on her arms.

"Tell me why you are crying", he demanded, and with this, Kayuki snapped.

"Why am I crying?" she asked, tears once again starting to pour on her cheeks, "Why am I crying?! Because of _you!_ Because of this stupid curse, because of _everything_!!!" the current Black Swan yelled while Akabara visibly flinched. "Because of _you_, I lost the opportunity to live a normal life! Because of _you, _I was forced to hunt you down or else I'll die in five years time! And all of it just because you want to get revenge?!"

Wiping her eyes with her sleeves, more tears tumbled down. "And you know what's more infuriating? Even if all you did was selfish, and I have all the right in the world to be angry with you, _I can't kill you!!!"_ With this statement, Strauss' eyes widened at Kayuki's shivering frame.

"K-Kayuki…"

"No matter how much my mind wants to make me angry at you, my heart tells the exact opposite: it tells me to not kill you! I can't kill you, Akabara, I can't! I don't know what to do about it, and I hate it, I hate you!!"

Not wanting to see Kayuki crying, the Vampire King embraced his eternal enemy, stroking her pink locks and ignoring her when she started to punch him, though it was weak. In the case of Kayuki though, she didn't want him holding her since it made it harder for her. She started punching him, all the while yelling for him to let go of her.

_The reason why I hate you is because you make me sad. The person that makes me weak, the person that distracts my soul, and the person that won't let me be alone, is you. I want you to love me, and yet, you love someone else. _

"Let go of me, dammit! Don't touch me, don't heal me, and don't make the pain go away! Let go of me!!!_ HANASE*!!!!" _Not mindful of it, Kayuki stopped punching Strauss and instead gripped his coat and sobbed on his chest."I hate… I hate all of you! Why did you have to live, all this time?!?!"

_The tears… The tears kept on overflowing, and I couldn't say anything more after that. The last thing I saw was Akabara's eyes, and then everything went totally black. Next thing I knew, I was in my room._

-----------------------------

Kayuki found Akabara later that night, lazily lounging outside the mansion. Taking her seat next to him, the Black Swan kept her eyes averted from Akabara's.

Gathering her courage, she turned to look at him. "About yesterday night…" And that was all it took her to say before the Vampire King turned to bring her in a hug. Totally speechless, Kayuki could only wrap her arms around him in turn.

"You know what? I can't kill you too" He chuckled.

Kayuki bit back a gasp. "Why…?"

Akabara broke the hug to kiss her forehead, "Because I love you too." He looked on her dazed eyes. "More than you can fathom"

She finally smiled, "I love you ". She gave her a quick peck on the cheek before facing him to give him a dazzling smile. "More than you can fathom".

* * *

*-Japanese of 'Let go of me'.

Okay folks, _finally! _This oh-so-beautiful person of yours finally uploaded a Vampire Juuji Kai story!! 'Gimme five, everyone!! Okay, apologies for making it a bit OC. Damn, baby! _Why_ can't I perfect the visualization of the characters?!?! **_WHY?!?!_** Uwaaa!! School is just a few days away!!! NOOOOO!!!! At least I get to see my crush again! XD Meh. I want to have my own Akabara!

Anyway, read and review!!!


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